The Hidden Costs of Being Perfect
Many people try to be perfect in everything they do. They want their work and life to be without any mistakes. But, trying to be perfect all the time can bring problems. In this article, we will talk about how wanting to be perfect can make us feel worried, hurt our friendships, make us scared of trying new things, stop us from being creative, and make it hard to manage our time.
Increased Anxiety
When you try to be perfect, you worry a lot. You might worry about not doing things right or not meeting your own high standards. This constant worry can make you feel anxious. For example, before giving a presentation, you might feel that it has to be perfect, leading to sleepless nights and a lot of stress. This worry doesn't just go away; it stays with you, making everyday tasks feel harder.
worry a lot:
to be very concerned or anxious about something
Example: I worry a lot about my exams.
doing things right:
doing things in a way that is correct and acceptable
Example: I want to make sure I do things right, so I 'm going to double-check my work.
high standards:
very good or strict rules or expectations
Example: I have high standards for myself and I always try to do my best.
constant worry:
worrying all the time
Example: I have constant worry about my job.
sleepless nights:
nights when you can not sleep
Example: I had sleepless nights before my presentation.
a lot of stress:
feeling very worried or anxious
Example: I have a lot of stress before my exams.
go away:
to stop existing or being a problem
Example: This worry doesn't just go away; it stays with you, making everyday tasks feel harder.
stays with you:
to continue to affect or bother someone
Example: The worry about the presentation stayed with me, making it hard to focus on other things.
making everyday tasks feel harder:
making simple tasks seem more difficult
Example: I 'm so stressed about my presentation that even simple tasks, like making coffee, feel harder.
Impaired Relationships
Trying to be perfect can also make it hard to have good relationships. If you expect too much from yourself, you might expect the same from friends and family. This can lead to disappointment and arguments. For instance, if you always want things done a certain way, it might upset your partner or friends who might feel they can't meet your standards. Over time, this can make it tough to enjoy time with others.
make it hard:
to make something difficult
Example: Trying to be perfect can also make it hard to have good relationships.
expect too much:
to have unrealistic expectations
Example: I expected too much from my friends and they let me down.
lead to:
to cause something to happen
Example: If you always want things done a certain way, it might upset your partner or friends who might feel they can't meet your standards. Over time, this can make it tough to enjoy time with others.
for instance:
used to give an example
Example: I like many kinds of fruit, for instance, apples, oranges, and bananas.
done a certain way:
in a specific manner
Example: I like my coffee done a certain way.
meet your standards:
to do things as well as you expect them to be done
Example: My friend is a perfectionist and expects everyone to meet her standards.
over time:
gradually, as time passes
Example: Over time, the relationship became stronger.
make it tough:
to make something difficult
Example: Trying to be perfect can make it tough to enjoy time with others.
Fear of Failure
The fear of making mistakes can stop you from trying new things. If you 're afraid of failing, you might not want to take risks or try something new. This can stop you from growing and finding new opportunities. For example, you might not apply for a job you want because you 're scared of not getting it. This fear can keep you stuck in the same place, not moving forward.
stop you from:
prevent you from doing something
Example: The fear of making mistakes can stop you from trying new things.
take risks:
to do something that is dangerous or uncertain in order to achieve a goal
Example: I decided to take a risk and start my own business.
moving forward:
to make progress or continue
Example: The company is moving forward with its plans to expand.
keep you stuck:
prevent you from moving forward or progressing
Example: The fear of failure can keep you stuck in the same place.
Decreased Creativity
Wanting everything to be perfect can also stop you from being creative. When you 're afraid of making mistakes, you might not try new or different things. You might stick to what you know because it feels safe. But this can stop you from coming up with new ideas. Creativity needs space to make mistakes and learn from them, but perfectionism doesn't allow for that.
stop you from:
prevent you from doing something
Example: The rain stopped us from going for a walk.
stick to:
to continue doing something or using something
Example: I 'm going to stick to my diet.
feels safe:
to feel comfortable and protected
Example: I like to stick to what I know because it feels safe.
coming up with:
to think of or create something new
Example: I 'm trying to come up with a new recipe for dinner.
make mistakes:
to do something wrong
Example: It's okay to make mistakes when you 're learning something new.
learn from them:
to use mistakes as opportunities to improve
Example: I made a mistake on my test, but I learned from it and did better on the next one.
doesn't allow for:
does not give the opportunity or possibility for something to happen
Example: The strict rules of the competition didn't allow for any mistakes.
Time Management Issues
Spending too much time making something perfect can also mean you 're not managing your time well. You might spend hours on a small detail of a project, leaving less time for other important tasks. This can make you feel rushed and stressed because you 're always trying to catch up. It's like trying to make a perfect meal but spending all your time on making the sauce and not having enough time to cook the rest of the food.
making something perfect:
spending too much time on something to make it perfect
Example: I spent hours making the sauce perfect, but I didn't have enough time to cook the rest of the food.
managing your time well:
doing things in a way that allows you to complete all your tasks on time
Example: I need to manage my time well so that I can finish all my homework.
spend hours:
to spend a lot of time on something
Example: I spent hours working on my project.
small detail:
a very small part of something
Example: The teacher asked the students to pay attention to the small details in the text.
less time for other important tasks:
not having enough time to do other things that are also important
Example: I spent so much time on my homework that I had less time for other important tasks, like studying for my test.
feel rushed and stressed:
to feel like you don't have enough time to do everything you need to do
Example: I have so much to do today, I 'm feeling rushed and stressed.
trying to catch up:
to be behind and trying to get ahead
Example: I 'm always trying to catch up on my work.
making a perfect meal:
spending too much time on a small detail of a project, leaving less time for other important tasks
Example: I spent hours on the sauce, but I didn't have enough time to cook the rest of the food.
spending all your time:
to spend too much time on something
Example: I spent all my time on the sauce and didn't have enough time to cook the rest of the food.
not having enough time to cook:
not having enough time to do something
Example: I don't have enough time to cook dinner tonight.
While trying to be perfect can lead to problems such as increased worry, damaged friendships, fear of trying new things, decreased creativity, and time management issues, it is not entirely negative. Aiming for high standards is beneficial when approached correctly. It is important to find a healthy balance between striving for the best and being kind to yourself. Recognizing that making mistakes is a natural part of learning and growth can help you manage perfectionism more effectively.
lead to:
to cause something to happen
Example: Trying to be perfect can lead to problems.
damaged friendships:
when friendships are ruined or broken
Example: I 'm sorry for what I said. I didn't mean to damage our friendship.
fear of trying new things:
being afraid to do something new
Example: I have a fear of trying new things, so I always order the same thing at restaurants.
time management issues:
difficulty in organizing and planning time effectively
Example: I have time management issues, so I often miss deadlines.
not entirely negative:
not completely bad
Example: The movie was not entirely negative. It had some good parts.
high standards:
a level of quality that is very good
Example: The company has high standards for its employees.
approached correctly:
done in a way that is right and effective
Example: Aiming for high standards is beneficial when approached correctly.
healthy balance:
a state in which different elements are equally important or successful
Example: It is important to find a healthy balance between work and play.
striving for the best:
trying to do the best you can
Example: I am striving for the best in my studies.
being kind to yourself:
accepting your mistakes and not being too hard on yourself
Example: It is important to be kind to yourself and accept that you will make mistakes.
making mistakes:
doing something wrong
Example: It's okay to make mistakes when you 're learning something new.
natural part:
something that is expected or normal
Example: Making mistakes is a natural part of learning.
Instead of always pushing for perfection, focus on doing your best and learning from each experience. This approach can lead to personal improvement without the stress of needing to be flawless. Remember, the goal is not to eliminate high standards, but to achieve them in a way that supports your well-being and happiness. It's about finding the right balance— doing well in what you do while accepting that it's completely okay not to be perfect all the time.
pushing for:
trying very hard to achieve something
Example: The team is pushing for a win in the championship game.
doing your best:
trying as hard as you can
Example: I 'm doing my best to finish this project on time.
learning from:
to gain knowledge or experience from something
Example: I 'm learning from my mistakes.
lead to:
to cause or result in something
Example: This approach can lead to personal improvement without the stress of needing to be flawless.
without the stress of:
without being stressed or worried about
Example: I can do my job without the stress of having to be perfect.
needing to be:
having to be
Example: I don't feel like I need to be perfect at everything.
achieve them:
to succeed in doing something
Example: I hope to achieve my goals this year.
supports your well-being:
helps you to be healthy and happy
Example: I need to find a job that supports my well-being.
finding the right balance:
doing well in what you do while accepting that it's okay not to be perfect all the time
Example: I 'm trying to find the right balance between work and family life.
doing well:
making progress or achieving success
Example: She is doing well in her new job.
not to be perfect all the time:
It is okay to make mistakes and not always be the best at everything.
Example: I am not perfect all the time, but I try my best.
